It’s shortly after six am and I’m wide awake. I don’t have any particular place to be. This morning I’m up early because Michael has to be at work in a short while. Michael is a real great guy. I love watching him dress in the morning. I never let him know I’m up. I just lie on my side and watch him. He always puts his socks on first. It’s like he starts on the bottom and works his way up. He’s like that with everything. He says no one misses out by working on the foundation of things. I agree with him. Most of the time.
My name is Felicia. I’m falling in love with a man I’m afraid to call my boyfriend. It’s not that I don’t think he’d be a good mate. I think he'd make an excellent mate. I’m just not sure I’m ready to let go of the others. Yes there are others. There’s Tim, he’s an amazing kisser. There’s also Jim, who is the BEST listener, and such a cutie patootie. And Eric, Kareem and John. Of course I'm not sleeping with all of them, at this time.
I often find that I like more than one person at a time. When I was younger they called me a flirt. The names have gotten far worse as I have gotten older. I always wonder how it's possible for a man to be intimate with twice as many partners as I can glance at and its not a problem. He is a player. He is a ladies man. He is sowing his oats, royal or otherwise.
As a woman, I am loose. I am nasty. I am to be shunned. It doesn't bother me. I know I'm not those things. What's more, even if I was, it would not be a problem. I could always say I was getting in touch with my masculine side.
Michael is done getting dressed and leans down to kiss me good by. I mumble something about him having a good day at work. I lay in the bed for several minutes after he leaves. When I am certain that he will not be returning for any forgotten items I reach under the mattress and retrieve my phone. There are calls to make and text to respond to. Before long my days schedule is packed. Breakfast with Jim, meeting Eric at the gym, lunch with John and coffee with Kareem. Tim wants to get together but he doesn't know what his schedule looks like for the day yet. I probably won't be seeing him. It's difficult for me to pencil people in on days like this.
No more lolly-gagging for me. Soon the day will start and I can't let it start without me. As I hop in the shower I am tempted to call a few of my single friends and let them know that there are plenty of good men out there. I smile as I think better of it. They would shoot them all down or lament their inability to find their own. Then they would call each other and talk. They would say that I wasn't lucky in love. Rather I was lucky in bed.
Easy. Sleazy. Slut. Floozy. Harlot. Tramp.
It doesn't bother me any. I know that I am not those things.
Discussion:
Do you know a Felicia Freebie?
Is she what you would consider promiscuous?
Do you think she is affected by what people think of her?
Are you a Felicia Freebie?
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